Listen to my Stories...
Monday, July 26, 2010 ♥ 10:09 PM
Kept in the Heart~
Feelings...
weird...
pain...
dizzy...
A sense of negativity...
can't cope well in camp...
has been in a rifle company for a year...
and out of nowhere...
posted to an admin company...
Everythin is new...
New envvironment...
New skills...
more of office skills...
Being there is really lonely...
no one to talk to...
bottled up feelins...
the stress level is high...
with all the superior's rank super high...
pressure came in...
I can't post any army thingy...
So,all i can post are my feelins and thoughts...
If you are lost in what I said...
not able to comprehend...
Do forgive me...
Just wana let out...
I vommited sometimes...
not able to cope with the pressure...
dizziness...
lost...
Mum...
my pillar of strength...
kept me goin on...
Afraid that this pillar may break anytime...
Nightmares...
Dreaming of my superiors stabbing me with a knife...
straight in the heart...
Anxiety...
always makin mistakes...
people coverin my ass...
When will I ever learn??
Father...
family problems set in...
dad always wantin money...
Will he do anythin irrational??
Dreams and reality...
I sometimes can't differentiate them...
afraid that I may go nuts...
Sleepless...
woke up almost every 2hours...
the slightest noise would wake me up...
tired...
yet unable to relax...
What should I do??
My mental state is fallin apart...
and all these kept in my heart...
♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥~♥